It’s a long December.

December 19, 2012

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It’s so odd how the weather has been so flip floppy. Yesterday we had freezing rain and today we have bright sunny skies and the temperature feels about 50 degrees. I really hope the human race hasn’t messed up the economy as bad as I think. It makes me sad because this world can be so beautiful and I don’t want it to be ruined. I want my children to be able to see how beautiful each season is. I don’t know. Just some food for thought.

I believe we are in the beginning stages of our household being sick. This really upsets me because it could’ve been avoided. My grandmother was watching the kids for the husband and I so we could finish up Christmas shopping for the boys. My aunt decided to go to her house and brought her sick son knowing that he was sick to begin with. My youngest is only four months old and his little body wouldn’t be able to handle a bad cold, let alone the flu. (Which is what her son has.) It just upsets me greatly. Especially since I hate, with a passion, seeing my kids down and out. Breaks my heart every single time.

I’ve been avoiding certain people recently. Call lit jealousy, call it what you will. But I’m not happy about the situation although I probably should be. Maybe I started something I shouldn’t have but I thought it was mutual. I guess my thoughts were wrong. I personally feel like I’m just “the back up” chick just incase all else fails. Rebound friendship. It’s actually a really horrible feeling. But I guess it’s my own fault, right? Should’ve known better. Should’ve seen it coming.

I’m still avoiding the in-laws. Especially since I found out today that my husband’s father told my husband to “save up his money” because he thinks that we’re paying to get his car fixed. Just because we are using it doesn’t mean we are going to waste our money to get it fixed for you. If you remember correctly, you pretty much stole my husband’s tax return money (they happen to have the same name) and bought a piece of shit car for us that lasted, what, a whole whopping six months? We never asked him to do that and as a matter of fact we had our own plan set in stone. But like I’ve stated before – this man always thinks he’s right. Always. One of the main reasons I just can’t bring myself to ever even remotely like him. I’ve tried and tried for my husband’s sake but I just can’t pretend anymore. Especially when he’s so blatantly open to rub whatever faults we have in our faces. I feel bad for my husband because he’s stuck with such a selfish person. I know he loves his father but that’s it; it’s only because he is his father. Not because he’s a role model, not because he gave him an incredible childhood, because he’s his father. My husband pretty much had the same childhood that I did. I think that’s one of reasons him and I clicked. We actually have a lot in common.

I feel horrible because Jude has been locked inside this damn house for a bit now and now it’s actually beautiful outside and yet I have to keep him inside because his brother is sick. He’s actually been acting a little funny himself so I’m thinking he just might be getting sick as well. I really hope that’s not the case though.

I guess that’s it for now. Until next time!
A few photos from today:

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One Response to “It’s a long December.”

  1. Beautiful boys. The third paragraph of this really kinda broke my heart. We need to talk

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