My apologies.

December 31, 2012

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I feel bad for turning this blog into a whine-o fest. I’m really not as miserable as I portray myself to be. Well, sometimes. But not AS much. I’m just struggling to find much happiness in much these days besides in my kids, whatever time I get with my husband and being able to pay off some of our bills. Other than that my life has become so routine that it’s disgusting.

Wake up anywhere between five am and six am.
Feed Eli and wait for Jude to get up.
Make breakfast then serve.
Clean, clean, clean.
Play with the boys.
Make lunch then serve.
Put boys down for nap.
Either clean or attempt to take a nap myself.
Kids wake up, feed them snacks.
Play, play, play.
Prepare dinner and make.
Clean up said playing listed above.
Serve Jude dinner, feed Eli.
Eli takes bath, goes to bed.
Jude and I either relax and watch a show/movie together
Jude either takes bath and then goes to sleep or just sleep.
Lastly, I either take a shower or skip it due to exhaustion.

That’s it. That’s my day in a nutshell. I’m hoping the husband finds a job locally so I can start looking for some part time work. I know I’m going to hate it because I’ve been with these kids almost 24/7 since day one but in the long run, it will be worth it. The money I’ll make will more than likely be junk change but I’ll be able to buy other necessities for this household. Everything will work out eventually.

This new year, I need tp focus more on the positive side of things. It’s so easy to think so negatively, especially when things are at a stressful point, but there’s so much more to be grateful for. The main one, we are all healthy. I couldn’t ask for anything better than that.

So, tonight my night will consist of going through my mind of all the positive things that have happened this year and probably passing out at 8 pm.

Happy New Year! ♡

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2 Responses to “My apologies.”

  1. Mom SabrinaLee said

    I know how sad it can be.You know you SHOULD be happy,because you have 2 beautiful boys and not too bad a life…but you feel so alone.I know that feeling huny.It does pass with time.Life is like the ocean sweetheart with waves that ebb and flow.Sometimes its good,up happy,others…its…….empty even with 2 beautiful kids.YOU have the right idea to try n keep thinking positive,,,it might help.Just kow your feelings are “normal”and it has NOTHING to do with how much you love those boys.You are thier mother…but Mand…your also a woman,a seperate person from the one your children will know….Take this time away from Dj to learn n grow and become stronger…in the long run……youll be so glad you did

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